I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
