Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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