Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
