I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Are my feet made of real feet?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize