He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
This is the high leading the old right now
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
