I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize