If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize