i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
People with herpes should wear stickers.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
