I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
