No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
