Texts From Last Night

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  (347): View more from New York

  Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude

  (650): View more from California

  So your saying just a blow job?

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  (347): Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude (650): So your saying just a blow job? http://tfl.nu/cev0
  Replies (6) Good night (929) Bad night (3309)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying

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  (917): I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying http://tfl.nu/unbu
  Replies (12) Good night (1044) Bad night (6219)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire

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  (757): No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire http://tfl.nu/j9c5
  Replies (3) Good night (3229) Bad night (998)
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  (530): View more from California

  If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...

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  (530): If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good... http://tfl.nu/ucmp
  Replies (14) Good night (2183) Bad night (3040)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.

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  (402): I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back. http://tfl.nu/jjtt
  Replies (8) Good night (2502) Bad night (833)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Did you get your crutches off the street sign?

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  (978): Did you get your crutches off the street sign? http://tfl.nu/v5z3
  Replies (2) Good night (1404) Bad night (1077)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.

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  (973): Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested. http://tfl.nu/rwnz
  Replies (1) Good night (1981) Bad night (714)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.

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  (817): Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday. http://tfl.nu/w47f
  Replies (9) Good night (2847) Bad night (812)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.

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  (856): After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk. http://tfl.nu/r983
  Replies (0) Good night (1745) Bad night (668)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.

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  (406): Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out. http://tfl.nu/4zrh
  Replies (1) Good night (358) Bad night (730)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  The entire state will know me by my boobs.

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  (304): The entire state will know me by my boobs. http://tfl.nu/8hqf
  Replies (3) Good night (555) Bad night (285)
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  (863): View more from Florida

  I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.

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  (863): I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't. http://tfl.nu/8mvt
  Replies (2) Good night (809) Bad night (258)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.

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  (717): I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve. http://tfl.nu/zwzg
  Replies (3) Good night (505) Bad night (249)
• Favorite

  (772): View more from Florida

  22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days

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  (772): 22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days http://tfl.nu/xtol
  Replies (8) Good night (466) Bad night (298)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.

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  (519): I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are. http://tfl.nu/adzb
  Replies (1) Good night (370) Bad night (114)

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