The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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