I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
