All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
My feet surprised me
That was before I lit my hair on fire
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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