Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
