we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
