i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
