I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Your topless pictures make me question reality
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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