brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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