She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
