now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
