Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
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Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
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I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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