The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
