I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
We left an ass print on the piano.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
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