last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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