Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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