We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
