I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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