problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize