Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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