you guys were way drunker than both of me
...so i touched it.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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