I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
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Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
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It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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