this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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