Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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