At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Randomize
