I wanna bring you to show and tell
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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