Plan B is the new Plan A
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
