My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
