My friends, they love my intelligence
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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