finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
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