I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.