the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
