You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
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