sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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