That's when you crack a 10am beer
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
