Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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