We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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