I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
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She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
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Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.