I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize