Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
