My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Randomize
