Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
