i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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